Mein Weltenbild
2020
2020
“Starting as lyrical diversion, ‘Mein Weltenbild‘ came to be at the time when COVID-19 forced me into the confines of my childhood home. Uncertainty and fear, paired with a seemingly endless repetition of daily experiences and the sheer inability to escape a situation that felt like the spreading of a global trauma, all of that left me incapable to work creatively then. I was unable to cope with the fact that this sudden event, an array of extrinsic circumstances, would impose such drastic restrictions on my life. Why me? Why now? My ego was hurt, and I felt disgusted by that fact at the same time.
To regain a sense of self and for my practise, I began to write. I wrote and wrote, mostly sitting at the desk of my childhood room, observing a view I had known for many years. It was a view that had always calmed me, but suddenly made me sick to my stomach. Still, sitting there, observing and writing, writing and observing – it helped. After a while, I felt a sensation of empowerment I had hardly ever experienced in my work before: in my writing, I was able to escape, through my writing, it was possible for me to define my own living again. Translating a poem I wrote into video, I began to metaphorically view myself as a painter: incapable to change the world as it is directly, but, looking at my window as a blank canvas, ever so potent to draw whatever I want right in front of me.”
To regain a sense of self and for my practise, I began to write. I wrote and wrote, mostly sitting at the desk of my childhood room, observing a view I had known for many years. It was a view that had always calmed me, but suddenly made me sick to my stomach. Still, sitting there, observing and writing, writing and observing – it helped. After a while, I felt a sensation of empowerment I had hardly ever experienced in my work before: in my writing, I was able to escape, through my writing, it was possible for me to define my own living again. Translating a poem I wrote into video, I began to metaphorically view myself as a painter: incapable to change the world as it is directly, but, looking at my window as a blank canvas, ever so potent to draw whatever I want right in front of me.”